We pigs are very vocal beings, but my leadership is an unspoken certainty. No one else was up for the job.
I don’t mind really. I know the humans really appreciate that I keep everyone in line, and it makes them feel good that they’re in cahoots with the roughest, toughest pig-in-charge.
I guess I do the work for them [the humans] really. I keep the others [pigs] in line and I’ve accepted them [humans] so they don’t have to get onto all fours and fight it out with Willy-Joel or Sandy. Seeing one of those scrawny two-leggeds on their knees trying to wrestle a 1000 Kilo pig is not something I need in my life right now.
When I say pigs are vocal, I’m not kidding. Today I had to have a stern speaking to four troublesome piglets names ‘the mini maloos’. They are new to Sugarshine, so I can forgive them for not following the rules just yet. First, I spotted their troublesome black and white patched be-hinds outside the fence – a big no-no from the start – and when they eventually caught on that they had to come back in, one piglet decided to be rebellious and stay outside the fence. You should have heard the curses that flew out of his mouth when he realised his siblings weren’t part of his plan! Thank goodness that the humans don’t try to speak our language or they would have learnt some new words that day! Pigs are usually very clean creatures. I can’t say that is true of those youngsters, after hearing what can come out of their mouths.
The four of them continued their unproductive profanity back and forth for a long while. Nothing I said or did had any effect on those young ruffians. All I can hope is that they will fall in line one day. Although I consider pigs to be very intelligent, I suppose I can’t speak for everyone.